I can't give you a clean start date for my burnout. I don't think anybody can. What I know is that it peaked during the COVID years, it was bad enough to call a breakdown, and it's the reason I finally got assessed and found out, at 50, that I have ASD.
So, how long does autistic burnout last? Months. Often longer. The working definition from researcher Dora Raymaker and her team says typically three months or more of exhaustion, lost skills and lower tolerance to noise, light and people. Some folks describe years. The thing that seems to decide it is whether anything changes in the life that caused it.
What the research actually says about how long it lasts
Less than you'd hope. Autistic burnout only got a proper research definition in 2020, in a study in Autism in Adulthood built with autistic people as co-researchers. They called it a syndrome caused by chronic life stress and "a mismatch of expectations and abilities without adequate supports." The National Autistic Society has a plain write-up by Raymaker herself if you want it straight from the source.
That "three months or more" is a floor. It isn't an average.
I haven't found a study I trust that says "average recovery: X months." If someone gives you a number with a decimal point in it, they're guessing.
What autistic people describe, again and again, is that it doesn't lift while the pressure stays the same. Take two weeks off, come back to the same job, the same noise, the same act you've been putting on since grade school, and you're right back in the hole by the end of the month.
What mine looked like
I was used to crashing. Boom, then crash, is pretty much the story of my life: huge energy on a new project, then nothing left. So at first I figured this was one more crash. It wasn't. My normal crashes lasted days, maybe a few weeks, and then the next shiny thing would drag me back out.
This one didn't let go.
Stuff I'd done on autopilot for decades got hard. Phone calls. Groceries. An email that needed two lines. Noise I'd put up with for years started to feel like someone running a sander on the inside of my skull. And the fuse got shorter. A friend came up with the word "robplosion" back when I was running Raincity Studios, for the times I'd lose it and blow up at people. During the burnout the robplosions were closer to the surface, and the shame afterwards was heavier.
I can't cleanly separate it from depression either, which has been around in my life for a long time. I wrote about that mess in burnout or depression.
How long did mine last? The worst of it, months. The tail, a lot longer than that. Honestly I'm not sure I'd say I'm all the way out. That's the real answer, and it's not a satisfying one.
Why does autistic burnout take so long to get over?
Because it built for years before anyone saw it. From the outside it looks sudden. A guy who was fine, and then wasn't. From the inside it's been stacking up quietly for ages.
For me, the stacking was about fifty years of masking without knowing I was masking. Being the guy who could run a room, full of ideas, funny, then going home completely flattened and not understanding why. (I go into that in what masking is.) If that's what drained the tank, a few long weekends were never going to fill it back up.
The other reason is simpler. You can't rest your way out of something while you keep doing the thing that caused it.
What shortened it, or at least stopped it getting worse
No cure list here. Just what helped me, plus what the research keeps pointing at.
Getting the diagnosis. Strange one. Nothing in my body changed the day I got it. But knowing why I was this tired let me stop calling myself lazy, and I stopped forcing the act at full volume all day.
Cutting demands, for real. Fewer commitments. Saying no and not explaining it for ten minutes. Living out here in La Petite-Nation helps. It's quiet, there's a lake, and the nearest crowd is a long drive away. (Fair warning, though: quiet can turn into a bubble you're scared to leave. That's a whole other post.)
Less input. Quieter rooms, fewer screens, more sleep. Sleep is the one I'd fight for. If you're going to spend money on one thing, a weighted blanket has an actual randomized trial behind it for insomnia in people with depression, anxiety and ADHD. It's not magic. It helps.
Weighted blanket (about 10% of body weight)
My take. A 2020 trial found weighted blankets cut insomnia in people with depression, anxiety and ADHD. The pressure just calms the body down.
Good to know. Can be hot. Pick around 10% of your body weight.
Being around people who get it. The NAS page lists acceptance and peer connection with other autistic people as part of recovery. I don't have many autistic people in my life, so this one is still a work in progress for me. I'm saying it anyway because it's on the list for a reason.
A professional in the loop. Burnout and depression overlap, and depression can get dangerous. In Québec you can start with your family doctor, your CLSC, or Info-Social 811 (option 2). An autism-aware therapist is worth the search.
When it's more than burnout
If months go by and nothing moves, or you start having thoughts of not wanting to be here, don't wait it out. Raymaker's work links burnout to suicidal thoughts for some autistic adults. Don't sit on it. Tell somebody now, not in six months. I've been in that place, and I'm still here because I asked for help. More on that in how masking broke me.